Saturday, October 22, 2011

His Gracious Provision

Lately, I've been conflicted on what comes next in life. Yes, I know that my last blog post also talked about this, so as you can see, it's really been on my mind.

Some things are becoming clearer, and it has been made evidently clear to me that I needed to get out of Dodge! God wanted me to get away. I needed a time to heal, a time to restore my spirit, and God in His abundant goodness, foresaw everything in the future, and laid this dream of returning to Russia on my heart long before I ever foresaw the need to retreat. How amazing is the Father to provide for His children, and to prepare well in advance a course for them that provides protection and a chance to renew their spirit?! Sitting here typing this, I am amazed at the Father, and am so grateful. He knew what I needed when I had no idea what to do next. He knew and He provided.

Why didn't I seek God when I needed help? For about a year now, I've been reading through the Old Testament, and time and time again, I've read how God provided for His people. He provided, even when they didn't deserve it, even when they didn't seek or trust Him. He is definitely more patience than I ever would be, and because of His patience, I am seeing a difference in myself. I'm healing and thankfully there won't be a horrible scar left on my soul, and the wound isn't festering with bitterness anymore.

Thank you God for your provision, for knowing what I need when I don't even know I need it yet!

Because He has been gracious with me in this, I'm putting more faith in Him for my future, there will be less doubting taking place in this heart!

Psalm 147
He Heals the Brokenhearted
"1 Praise the LORD! For it is good to sing praises to our God;
for it is pleasant, and a song of praise is fitting.

2The LORD builds up Jerusalem;
he gathers the outcasts of Israel.
3He heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds.
4He determines the number of the stars;
he gives to all of them their names.
5 Great is our Lord, and abundant in power;
his understanding is beyond measure.

6The LORD lifts up the humble;
he casts the wicked to the ground.

7 Sing to the LORD with thanksgiving;
make melody to our God on the lyre!
8He covers the heavens with clouds;
he prepares rain for the earth;
he makes grass grow on the hills.
9He gives to the beasts their food,
and to the young ravens that cry.

10His delight is not in the strength of the horse,
nor his pleasure in the legs of a man,
11but the LORD takes pleasure in those who fear him,
in those who hope in his steadfast love..."

Monday, October 10, 2011

Leaping Into The Unknown

It's hard to have faith. Oh it's easy to talk about, and it's easy to claim that you have it, but it's a lot harder when you have to step out in it. It's hard when you have to trust God and you need to make bold moves without complete assurance.

Lately, I've been questioning what comes next in my life. The last two decisions to live in Russia came pretty easily, but not always quickly. The first time, I heard God calling me to come to Russia, it took me about 10 years to get here! But, I knew my calling, it was clear, and God affirmed it several times, in several different ways. Then the second time, it was also clear and God provided everything, and thankfully it didn't take me nearly as long to get back here.

For this next chapter of life, I'm not really sure what to do. I have a general idea, but it seems almost impossible! It's going to take a lot of faith.

Faith to rely on God and His will for my life. Faith to know what I am desiring comes from God. Faith to be obedient and to take that huge leap into unknown territory.

So, I guess I'm asking for prayers that my desires are God's desires. Also, I want to be obedient and take that huge leap, even though I have no idea where I'm going to land!

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